Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Up late, little sleep, mind running. And bugs.

For those of you who know me, you know that when I am overwhelmed, anxious or freaked out, I tend to over think things.  I have officially reached that point.

The less-than-two-week countdown has begun.  I have 10 days (considering it's past midnight, so it's Wednesday), T-E-N, ten days until I depart.  Holy moly.  And, here I am way up past midnight, blogging when I should me resting to gear up for the next days packing/preparing adventure.  Fun times.

Worry #1- Flying into San Pedro Sula and making my way to Copan Ruinas with all of my stuff, in one piece, safely.

Currently worry #2- Bugs.  Go ahead, you can chuckle.  You all know that I am NOT a bug person.  Blah!  But, Honduras has all sorts of things... one of them being scorpions.  Really? A scorpion? Oh man.  And, cockroaches, spiders, other creepy looking things.

I have to remind myself that I am doing this to get out of my comfort zone, learn more things about myself (will I actually be able to live with these... creatures one day?) and be more open.  I also remind myself that volunteers wouldn't still be going if someone got seriously injured or died from a bad bug bite or attack.  ... right?

Ha, these are the things I am thinking about now.  A little window into the musings of my mind. :)  So many people have asked me what I think my plans will be when I return from Honduras (out of valid concern and interest, as I did leave an amazing job).  I usually respond with something like, "I really don't know. Maybe I will return to Children's, but at least I have the option of going somewhere else."  Usually the person then nods in understanding and we move on.  But, in my head I am thinking, "I have NO idea!! I haven't even left yet!" My focus right now is on the aforementioned AND surviving the packing/seeing people/trying not to panic.  I am a little preoccupied freaking out about the present, that I really have no time, nor energy, to freak out about the future. :)

One day I will laugh about this and tell the story to my grandkids.

Please pray for me.  I need all the extras that I can get.  Oh, and Happy Advent!  Christmas is cominggggg. :)

3 comments:

  1. Your fears are totally legit, but the thing is, worrying about things is always worse than when you face them. You'll be way less scared when you're actually trying to find your bus than when you're thinking about it now. Whenever I remind myself of things like this, it still doesn't help and I still obsess. I'm sure you will too. :)

    Also, I feel you about that future thing! People, stop it! If you need something to talk about, talk about the present or the WEATHER or Christmas. Stop asking really upsetting questions!! They just ask because they can't think of anything else, I'm sure, but geez. Get an imagination!!

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  2. Hi Jen, you came up on my facebook newsfeed and I realized you were up to an adventure, so I found your blog. I know what you mean about bugs. Remember the big ones in the DR? I thought you might enjoy this excerpt from my 3rd day in Banica:

    "Overall, I'm excited to be here, and can't wait to jump in. I'm also looking forward to becoming more accustomed to having bugs around. Right now using the latrine elevates my blood pressure to dangerous levels. The first night there was a huge, nasty black spider and a roach with wings. But I came out unscathed."

    So I know how you feel! I think the important thing is that I came out unscathed. It was always a penance when I saw bugs. But hey, penances are just opportunities for love...and that is what you are going to Honduras for! All of those things fade, and what matters is the people and the place, and the grace God pours on you.

    I'm really excited for you...what a great adventure!

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  3. Hi Sam! :) Thanks for that. Great excerpt from your blog! I hope you are doing well!

    And, thanks Mart... as always. :)

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